Spätzle: A Slacker’s Noodle and a Lesson on Energy and Work

I dearly love homemade noodles in my soup. But I’m lazy, so I make spätzle instead. It’s a German egg dumpling and a close cousin to both a traditional egg noodle and reebles.

Homemade noodles are time consuming and create something of a mess that needs to be cleaned up. In short they are a lot of work. Even though I have a pasta machine, I seldom make them anymore. Maybe President Obama is right. We’ve become a nation of lazy slackers and that’s why our current recession is so persistent.

Jonah Goldberg observes, in the National Review Online, that the president has been obsessing on this notion for any number of months. (Full Text)

But maybe the president has never had a basic physics course and does not comprehend the relationship between energy and work. It could be this lack of knowledge has put a stranglehold on our economy. I must note that people who aspire to become community organizers in college generally shy away from courses in physics.

With regard to the relation between energy and work, in Europe electric motors are sized according to the energy they use, expressed in kilowatts. Something the president wants us to use less of. In the U.S. electric motors are sized according to work, in horse power. Something the president wants us to do more of.

There is a contradiction here. Energy and work are the same thing. One horse power is equivalent to 0.77 kilowatts of electricity.

My home on average uses about 23 kilowatt hours of electricity or about the equivalent of a horse toiling away twenty-four hours a day to keep my lights on, to run my refrigerator and freezer, to braise my veal chops and such. All of that is “work.” That’s it. The calculus is simple.

Because I am lazy, I really do not want to scrub my wash with a washboard. It’s nasty work. But the Department of Energy efficiency standards for household appliances have created machines that work so poorly that if I want clean clothes the washboard maybe my only option.

Now the president is pushing “alternative” energy. (There is no such thing. Energy is Energy.) And he envisions a future of Chevy Volts powered by wind turbine generated electricity. It will take quite a few of those turbines to power a nation-wide fleet of electric cars. The usable power in the Chevy Volt’s battery is 16 kilowatt hours. By comparison the energy stored in a gallon of gasoline is about 36 kilowatt hours.

On average the Volt will travel about 35 miles on electricity alone – not too far. There are plenty of conventional cars that get around 35 miles to the gallon. So in electric mode it is somewhat more than twice efficient than a conventional automobile. But here’s the kicker. Electricity costs me 11 cents a kilowatt hour. The relative price of electric energy compared to gasoline is $3.69 a gallon. If you were add in average state and federal transportation fuel taxes that price would climb to about $4.20 a gallon. That’s about a $1 a gallon more than I’m paying for gas right now. The Volt’s increased efficiency is diminished by relative energy costs.   

In the real world the Volt doesn’t save much over other fuel stingy vehicles. According to Edmunds, the automotive publishing house, in a fuel cost comparison under typical driving conditions the Volt averaged 41 mpg, with total fuel costs of $88.55. A relatively conventional Volkswagen Jetta TDI averaged 37.2 mpg with total fuel costs of $90.88. (Full Text)

Even if you typically drive less than 40 miles a day, you might save $2 a day. Well, for someone who can afford a $40,000+ car, $2 a day isn’t a big deal. People who can afford a $40,000+ car want something that is a pleasure to drive. In short the Volt is a car without a market. On the other hand, Chevy’s more pricy and less fuel efficient Corvette is. So is the far less costly and almost fuel efficient Fiat 500.

Besides, if every American drove a Volt we would need a nation forested with windmills and in the end have virtually nothing to show for it. For this American tax payers are giving those who buy a Volt a $7,500 tax credit. As for the windmills, it seems they are being abandoned when their useful life and energy subsidies come to an end – some 14,000 in the U.S. have met this fate – and stand like giant parched corn stalks bracing the wind. For nothing. (Full Text)

President Obama is pursuing policies that will necessarily increase our electric rates, inhibit domestic hydrocarbon energy production and is raising CAFÉ fuel efficiency standards that will necessarily cause the price of automobiles to skyrocket. In short he is making “work” more and more costly and wonders why the economy remains in the doldrums. The American economy crumbles for a want of a course in introductory physics. Energy is work.

Now on to a slacker’s delight -- spätzle. For these you will need an egg or two, flour, baking powder and salt. Parsley, chives other optional ingredients can be added depending upon the circumstances of the spätzle’s final destination on the plate or in the bowl. This recipe is from Joy of Cooking. I like to use a 50/50 mix of all-purpose flour and semolina flour. And if I boil them in a bullion-cube broth I cut down the salt in mix.

Spätzle        Serves Four

2 eggs

1 ½ Cups Four

½ Cup Water

½ Teaspoon Salt

¼ Teaspoon Baking Powder  

2 Tablespoons of butter (Optional)

A dusting of Paprika and Parsley for a Garnish                         

In a generous mixing bowl combine water, salt and baking powder. Beat in the eggs then gradually add the flour until the mixture is smooth and has the consistency of a heavy paste. In batches, drop the batter in slowly boiling water or stock drop ¼ teaspoon at a time. Gently boil for about 5 minutes until the dumpling float to the surface. Transfer the dumplings to a casserole pan.  Add the butter and sprinkle with parsley and paprika and serve.

Cheese Bintzes and the Food Stamp Challenge

I made cheese blintzes. It was something of an adventure because I hadn’t made them before. And while Rita regularly had them at home while growing up, she wasn’t much help in guiding the way. And so it went with my participation in the Food Stamp Challenge. The blintzes were crucial to my effort.

The non-profit group Fighting Poverty With Faith issued the Food Stamp Challenge in a lobby effort to protect the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program from budget cuts. It requires participants to limit their food budget to $1.50 meal, the average per meal amount food stamp recipients receive. According to The Hill at least nine Democratic congressmen took up the challenge. (Full Text)

When Rita read about this in the newspaper she said I should take the challenge.

“Is there some sort of prize,” I asked.

“No,” she said, “but we don’t spend much more than that on groceries, as it is.”

I took the challenge. Here’s how it went:

Sunday – roast chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, onions and carrots. I bought the largest roasting chicken I could find. It was about 4.5 lbs. and would be good for at least another six meals: two beautiful chicken sandwiches with lettuce and mayo and a pot of hearty chicken noodle soup to amply feed four. It cost $8.50.

Monday – beef roulade with potato dumpling, gravy and sugar snap peas. The roulade is a thinly sliced round steak, layered with two strips of bacon and then wrapped around a large carrot stick, a rib of celery and a dill pickle spear. Delicious – I make these regularly. The cost driver in this meal is the steak and bacon and is less than $1.10 a serving.  The potato dumplings were made from the left over mashed potatoes, an egg and enough flour to stiffen the mix for rolling into balls. The yield on this was four servings. Rita snacked on the left overs for breakfast.

Tuesday – lamb ragout. This might have been a deal breaker, but it was oh so good. It was made from a 0.43 lb. lamb shoulder chop costing about $8 a pound. I cut this beauty into stew meat and brazed in a combination of equal parts of chicken stock, beef stock and red wine. The stew was finished with two peeled, seeded and diced fresh Roma tomatoes, an onion, ½ of a bell pepper and sliced green olives. It was thickened with tomato paste and simply seasoned with garlic, basil and oregano. Finally it was tossed with cooked rotini pasta. I think this dish might have cost $2.60 a plate.

Wednesday and Saturday -- chicken soup with buttered toast triangles for dunking.

Thursday – meatloaf from 1 lb. ground chuck, an egg, two table spoons of chili sauce, onion soup mix and a cup of bread crumbs. I had this with Betty Crocker scalloped potatoes and an iceberg lettuce salad. The leftover meatloaf was good for another three sandwiches.

And now we come to the adventure. Friday – cheese blintzes. A blintz is simply a thin pancake. In France they are called crêpes and in Italy, crespelle.  In Eastern Europe, Russia and Ukraine they are called blintzes.

Like hearty soup with bread, they are part of peasant cuisine.  I knew that if I were to meet the Food Stamp Challenge I would need to cook like a peasant. After all, Rita had them regularly while growing up and both of her parents were honest to god German-Ukrainian peasants. So I placed the here-to-for unknown to me, cheese blintz on my menu.

While blintzes can be filled with any number things, Rita’s mom made cheese blintzes filled with either cottage or farmer’s cheese and topped with cherry pie filling. Rita did not want that. She rejected the cottage cheese, and suggested Ricotta instead. Nor would she have anything to do with cherry pie filling. Beyond that advice I was on my own. The result was magnificent and a recipe will follow.

Now I don’t really know if $1.50 per meal is miserly or overly generous food assistance for the poor. But I do know that the SNAP program is supposedly a supplemental program and for $2 a plate one can eat very well indeed, provided there is a little peasantry in one’s food culture. And to a significant degree, that’s what the best cookbooks are all about. Think of the Joy of Cooking, Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking or Marcella Hazan’s Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking.  

I normally spend between $70 and $85 a week on groceries. Rita packs a lunch every day. I normally pack a lunch two or three days a week. On the days when I buy a lunch the cost is normally under $5.

My local newspaper columnist James E. Causey also accepted to food stamp challenge. His account of his experience presents joyless and unhappy week of eating, anchored by skinless, boneless chicken breasts, turkey burgers, canned soup and peanut butter sandwiches. (Full Text) And after enduring this purgatory like menu he oddly concludes:

“The experiment reinforced my belief that there should be restrictions on what can be purchased with food stamps. Food stamps are meant to be a supplement, and with the nation facing an obesity epidemic, restrictions should be placed on sugary snacks, chips and sodas, cookies and cakes.

These restrictions actually would help those who use food stamps to make healthier food choices by eliminating the least healthy options. It would curb impulse buys, such as candy bars or bags of chips while waiting in line.

When I was at Aldi, a family ahead of me at the checkout was overdrawn on their food stamps and had to put back some food. What they put back were several Arizona Ice Teas, Popsicles, ice cream and bags of chips.

In that family of five, four of the people were overweight. With more than 40 million people currently using food stamps, don't we want to make sure people are making the healthiest food choices?“

But enough of that, it speaks for itself. Instead let me offer you a recipe for delicious cheese blintzes.

Cheese Blintzes with Caramelized Apple Slices

For the Blintz (makes six):

½ cup of half and half

1/3 cup of flour

¼ teaspoon salt

1 egg

Slowly wisk the flour into the half and half making sure to beat out all the lumps. Wisk in the egg and salt to complete the batter.

Fry these in a lightly buttered 10” sauté pan on medium heat.  About three tablespoons of batter will do for each blintz. The batter swirled to coat the bottom of the pan to make a very thin 8” pancake.

For the cheese filling:

6 oz. Ricotta Cheese

2 oz. Cream Cheese softened at room temperature

2 heaping tablespoon crumbled blue chees      

For the sauce

1 Apple pealed cored and thinly sliced

2 oz. Apple cider

2 oz. Maple Syrup

1/8 teaspoon ea. Allspice, ground cloves, ground cinimon.

Saute the apple slice in butter until browned and limp. Add cider to cover then add the spices and maple syrup. Bring mix to a slow boil then simmer to keep it warm.

To assemble

Fill the blintzes by centering an oblong mound cheese filling on each pancake, fold the sides over the filling then roll the blintz up to fully enclose the filling. Place the filled blintzes seam side down on a non-stick sheet pan and bake at 350⁰ for 15 minutes. Then serve topped the caramelized apple sauce.